We spend our lives searching for something that we only catch glimpses of in passing. Something that we want to believe is real so badly we end up convincing ourselves of its existence. It is this belief that we hold on to. We tell ourselves it can be found at the end of cold October nights; promise that it is lost within mundane activities, that we will feel it's true power while changing sheets and washing pots. We think it's seen in one another from across crowded rooms. It's the goodness that keeps us going.
Until it doesn't. Until you realize that this goodness you've sought for has never existed. Ever. Everything caves in and crumbles then. We learn the foundation to which we stood was never there. Everyone is a liar. Moments are nothing more than 60 seconds of time that pass between inhaling. We learn people are inherently evil.
We ourselves, the preservers of the goodness we seek - liars too. Caught lying to ourselves. We're all cowards. All willing to do anything to conceal who we really are.
You come out of your trance with a new perspective. A straight path ahead of you and new belief that the only person you can trust is yourself. Deep down you know, even then you are walking a very fine line.